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Jisajili
IngiaJisajili
Opinionacademic·2021

Some people think that governments should spend money on preventing illnesses by providing healthy food and teaching people about healthy eating habits rather than spending money on treatment. Do you agree or disagree?

Andika angalau maneno 250. Unapaswa kutumia takriban dakika 40 katika kazi hii.

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Step 1

Vidokezo vya Mtahini kwa Mada Hii

1

When tackling this opinion essay, clearly state your agreement or disagreement in the introduction, for instance, 'I strongly agree that governments should prioritise preventive healthcare.' While acknowledging the necessity of treatment for existing conditions, ensure your main argument consistently champions prevention as the more sustainable and cost-effective long-term solution throughout your body paragraphs.

2

Consider using real-world examples like Finland's success with the North Karelia Project, which significantly reduced cardiovascular disease through public health campaigns and dietary changes. You could also reference the long-term economic benefits, such as reduced healthcare expenditure, or the improved national productivity from a healthier workforce.

3

A common pitfall is discussing the merits of both prevention and treatment equally without taking a clear, dominant stance on which should be prioritised. To avoid this, dedicate the majority of your essay to arguing for your chosen side, perhaps by framing the 'other' side as a necessary but ultimately less impactful or sustainable approach in the context of the question's 'rather than' premise.

4

For this opinion essay, employ a 'concession and rebuttal' strategy in your body paragraphs to demonstrate a nuanced understanding. Start a paragraph by acknowledging a point for the opposing view using phrases like 'While it is undeniable that...' or 'Admittedly, treatment is crucial...', then swiftly transition to your counter-argument with 'However, a more proactive approach...' or 'Nevertheless, the long-term benefits of prevention outweigh...'

5

Examiners look for a sophisticated understanding of the socio-economic implications of both approaches, not just a simple 'prevention is better' argument. A band 8-9 response will demonstrate a nuanced perspective, perhaps discussing the ethical considerations or the practical challenges of implementing widespread preventive measures, while still maintaining a clear overall stance and well-developed arguments.

Step 2

Muundo wa Aya Unaopendekezwa

1
Utangulizi

Eleza swali kwa maneno yako mwenyewe na ueleze wazi msimamo WAKO.

  • Usinakili swali neno kwa neno — ubadilishe kwa kutumia maneno yenye maana sawa.
  • Toa maoni yako katika sentensi ya mwisho ya utangulizi.
  • Usizidi sentensi mbili au tatu.

Misemo ya Kuanzia

It is often argued that...There is a growing debate about whether...In my view, ... because ...
2
Kifungu cha Mwili 1 — Hoja Kuu

Wasilisha hoja yako yenye nguvu zaidi kwa mfano maalum.

  • Anza na sentensi ya mada iliyo wazi inayoelezea hoja.
  • Toa usaidizi kwa mfano maalum, takwimu, au kisa halisi cha ulimwengu.
  • Eleza KWA NINI mfano huu unaunga mkono hoja yako.

Misemo ya Kuanzia

The primary reason I hold this view is that...This is clearly illustrated by...For instance, in many countries...
3
Kifungu cha Mwili 2 — Hoja ya Kusaidia

Ongeza hoja ya pili inayounga mkono msimamo wako kutoka kwa mtazamo tofauti.

  • Chagua mtazamo tofauti — ikiwa aya ya 1 ilikuwa ya kiuchumi, jaribu ya kijamii au ya kimazingira.
  • Tumia aina tofauti ya ushahidi (uchunguzi wa kibinafsi, utafiti, mantiki)
  • Unganisha tena na hoja yako kuu.

Misemo ya Kuanzia

Furthermore, it is worth considering that...Another compelling argument is that...This is further supported by the fact that...
4
Hitimisho

Rudia maoni yako na ufupishe hoja zako kuu.

  • USIanzishe mawazo mapya katika hitimisho
  • Eleza msimamo wako kwa kutumia maneno tofauti na yale yaliyotumiwa katika utangulizi.
  • Iweke kwa sentensi mbili.

Misemo ya Kuanzia

In conclusion, I firmly believe that...To sum up, the evidence clearly suggests that...

Step 3

Msamiati Muhimu

preventive healthcareMeasures taken to prevent diseases rather than cure them.
public health initiativesOrganised efforts by public health authorities to improve the health of a community.
fiscal burdenThe financial strain or cost placed on a government or economy.
it is widely acknowledged thatA phrase used to introduce a generally accepted fact or belief.
a compelling argument can be madeA phrase used to introduce a strong and persuasive reason or point.
this notion is predicated onThis idea or belief is based on or depends on something else.
from my perspectiveA phrase used to introduce one's personal opinion or viewpoint.
the evidence overwhelmingly suggestsA phrase indicating that there is a very strong amount of proof pointing towards a particular conclusion.
notwithstandingIn spite of; despite.
this is not to say thatA phrase used to clarify that a previous statement does not imply something else.

Step 4

Academic Phrases for This Essay Type

It is widely acknowledged thatThere is compelling evidence to suggestThis phenomenon can be attributed toA growing body of research indicatesThe implications of this are far-reachingThis raises important questions aboutFrom a broader perspectiveIt would be short-sighted to ignore

Kujumlisha

MoreoverFurthermoreIn additionWhat is more

Tofauti

HoweverNeverthelessOn the other handConversely

Sababu / Athari

ConsequentlyAs a resultThereforeThis leads to

Mfano

For instanceTo illustrateA case in point isSuch as

Ruzuku

AlthoughWhile it is true thatDespiteAdmittedly

Step 5

Grammar Patterns for Band 7+

Sentensi changamano yenye konsesheni

Although some argue that technology isolates people, the evidence suggests it strengthens connections.

Inamwonyesha mtahini kuwa unaweza kushughulikia sentensi tegemezi. Anza na 'Although/While' + mtazamo tofauti, kisha toa mtazamo wako.

Masharti (Aina ya 2)

If governments invested more in public transport, traffic congestion would decrease significantly.

Inafaa kwa hoja na suluhisho za kinadharia. 'If + past simple, would + infinitive'.

Sauti ya utendaji kwa ajili ya sauti ya kitaaluma

It is often argued that education should be free. However, this view overlooks the practical challenges.

Uandishi wa kitaaluma unapendelea matumizi ya sauti ya upatanishi. 'It is + past participle + that' inasikika kuwa na mamlaka.

Kifungu cha uhusiano

Students who study abroad, which is becoming increasingly common, tend to develop greater independence.

Vifungu vya uhusiano huongeza maelezo bila kuanza sentensi mpya. Tumia 'who' kwa watu, 'which' kwa vitu.

Kifungu cha nomino kwa msongamano

The rapid expansion of urban areas has led to increased pollution levels.

Weka taarifa katika virai nomino badala ya kutumia sentensi nyingi fupi. Hii itakusaidia kupata alama za juu katika Lexical Resource.

Step 6

Jibu la Mfano

Jisajili bila malipo ili usome jibu kamili la mfano kwa mada hii.

Jisajili ili Usome Jibu la Mfano

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