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Opinionacademic·2022

Prison is not a cure for crime. Society should try other means to solve the problem of crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Sumulat ng **hindi bababa sa 250 na salita**. Maglaan ng ~40 minuto. Ito ay isang tunay na IELTS exam-style question.

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Step 1

IELTS Mga payo ng examiner para sa paksa na ito

1

For this 'To what extent' question, clearly state your degree of agreement or disagreement in your introduction, for example, 'I largely agree that prison is not a cure and alternative means are crucial.' While maintaining this stance, acknowledge the valid role prisons play in incapacitation and deterrence in a concessionary clause (e.g., 'While prisons serve a vital function in protecting society...'), then pivot back to their limitations as a 'cure' and the necessity of other solutions.

2

Argue that high global recidivism rates demonstrate prison's failure to rehabilitate, often acting as 'schools of crime.' Contrast this with examples like Norway's focus on restorative justice and rehabilitation programs, which have demonstrably lower re-offending rates. Also, discuss addressing root causes such as poverty, lack of education, and mental health issues through community-based initiatives, citing studies that link these factors to criminal behaviour.

3

A common pitfall is discussing the pros and cons of prison in general terms without directly addressing the core assertion: 'prison is not a cure for crime.' Students often describe prison functions without evaluating their effectiveness as a *solution* or *cure*. To avoid this, ensure every argument explicitly links back to whether a particular aspect of the penal system *cures* crime or if *alternative means* are more effective in achieving that 'cure.'

4

Employ a 'concession and contrast' strategy. Begin a paragraph by acknowledging a counter-argument or a limited benefit of the current system (e.g., 'Admittedly, incarceration provides immediate public safety...'), then use a strong transition to introduce your main argument that challenges or elaborates on this (e.g., '...however, this punitive approach rarely addresses the underlying causes of crime, leading to high recidivism.'). This demonstrates nuanced thinking.

5

Examiners look for a sophisticated understanding of the nuances of criminal justice, moving beyond a simplistic 'prisons are bad' or 'prisons are good' stance. A band 8-9 answer will critically evaluate the *effectiveness* of different approaches in *curing* crime, using precise academic vocabulary related to criminology (e.g., rehabilitation, incapacitation, restorative justice, recidivism) and providing well-supported arguments with logical progression and real-world examples.

Step 2

Inirerekomendang Isturktura ng Sanaysay (Band 7+ Standard)

1
Panimula

Kumbinsihin agad ang examiner at ipakita ang iyong posisyon.

  • Iparaphrase ang tanong gamit ang malalakas na sinonimo — iwasan ang kopya ng mga salita
  • Ipaunawa nang malinaw ang iyong opinyon sa huling pangungusap — huwag mag-iiwan ng duda
  • Panatilihin ito maikli: 2–3 pangungusap lamang. Bawat salita ay dapat may saysay.

Band 7 Mga simula ng pangungusap para sa bawat talata

It is often argued that...There is a growing debate about whether...In my view, ... because ...
2
Unang Talata — Pinakamalakas na Argumento Mo

Gumamit ng pinakamakapangyarihang rason na may hindi mapagtatagpuang ebidensya.

  • Simulan sa malakas na paksang pangungusap — ipahayag ang iyong argumento nang may tapang
  • Suportahan ng konkretong ebidensya: estadistika, tunay na kaso, o pananaliksik ng eksperto
  • Ipaliwanag nang eksakto KUNG PAANO pinatutunayan ng ebidensya ang iyong punto — i-connect ang mga dots para sa examiner

Band 7 Mga simula ng pangungusap para sa bawat talata

The primary reason I hold this view is that...This is clearly illustrated by...For instance, in many countries...
3
Pangalawang Talata — Suportang Argumento

Palakasin ang iyong posisyon gamit ang komplementaryong pananaw.

  • Pumili ng ibang anggulo — kung pang-ekonomiya ang una, subukan ang panlipunan, pangkapaligiran, o pang-etika
  • Gamitin ang bagong ebidensya — iwasan ang pag-uulit ng parehong halimbawa o rason
  • I-link nang direkta sa iyong thesis — ipakita kung paano ito palakasin ang buong posisyon mo

Band 7 Mga simula ng pangungusap para sa bawat talata

Furthermore, it is worth considering that...Another compelling argument is that...This is further supported by the fact that...
4
Konklusyon

Mag-iwan ng matibay na impresyon gamit ang tiyak at nakaaalala mong wakas.

  • Huwag kailanman mag-introduce ng bagong ideya — ito ay iyong huling buod lamang
  • I-ulit ang iyong posisyon gamit ang mas malakas na bokabularyo kaysa sa panimula
  • Panatilihin itong makapangyarihan: 2 pangungusap lamang. Tapusin nang may awtoridad.

Band 7 Mga simula ng pangungusap para sa bawat talata

In conclusion, I firmly believe that...To sum up, the evidence clearly suggests that...

Step 3

Mataas na markang bokabularyo at mga collocation

Recidivism ratesThe percentage of former prisoners who are rearrested or reconvicted for a similar offense within a specific period after their release.
Restorative justiceAn approach to justice that focuses on repairing the harm caused by crime, involving victims, offenders, and the community in finding solutions.
Socio-economic factorsThe social and economic elements that influence an individual's life, such as poverty, education level, and employment opportunities.
It is widely acknowledged thatA phrase used to introduce a generally accepted fact or common understanding.
A compelling argument can be madeA phrase indicating that a strong and persuasive case can be presented for a particular viewpoint.
This notion is predicated onThis idea or concept is based on or depends fundamentally on a particular assumption or principle.
From my perspectiveA phrase used to introduce one's personal opinion or viewpoint.
The evidence overwhelmingly suggestsA phrase used to indicate that there is a large amount of data or information that strongly supports a particular conclusion.
NotwithstandingIn spite of; despite. Used to introduce a contrasting or qualifying point.
This is not to say thatA phrase used to clarify a statement by indicating what is *not* being implied or asserted.

Step 4

Academic Phrases for This Essay Type

It is widely acknowledged thatThere is compelling evidence to suggestThis phenomenon can be attributed toA growing body of research indicatesThe implications of this are far-reachingThis raises important questions aboutFrom a broader perspectiveIt would be short-sighted to ignore

Dagdag

MoreoverFurthermoreIn additionWhat is more

Kontrasta

HoweverNeverthelessOn the other handConversely

Dahilan / Epekto

ConsequentlyAs a resultThereforeThis leads to

Halimbawa

For instanceTo illustrateA case in point isSuch as

Pagsang-ayon sa kabaliktaran

AlthoughWhile it is true thatDespiteAdmittedly

Step 5

Grammar Patterns for Band 7+

Kumplikadong pangungusap na may pagsang-ayon sa kabaliktaran

Although some argue that technology isolates people, the evidence suggests it strengthens connections.

Nagpapakita ng advanced na grammatical control. Simulan sa 'Although/While' + kabaligtarang pananaw, tapos ipahayag ang iyong posisyon — nagpapakita ng nuanced thinking.

Conditional (Type 2)

If governments invested more in public transport, traffic congestion would decrease significantly.

Perpekto para sa hypothetical na sitwasyon at solusyon. Struktura: 'If + past simple, would + infinitive' — nagpapakita ng flexibility at imagination.

Passive para sa academic na tono

It is often argued that education should be free. However, this view overlooks the practical challenges.

Academic writing ay pabor sa passive constructions. 'It is + past participle + that' ay lumilikha ng authoritative at objective na tono.

Relative clause

Students who study abroad, which is becoming increasingly common, tend to develop greater independence.

Nagdaragdag ng sophistication nang hindi komplikado. Gamitin ang 'who' para sa tao, 'which' para sa bagay, 'that' para sa alinman.

Noun phrase para sa density

The rapid expansion of urban areas has led to increased pollution levels.

Nakakapack ng higit na impormasyon sa mas kaunting salita. 'The implementation of effective policies' vs 'policies are implemented effectively' — tumataas ang Lexical Resource score.

Step 6

Band 9 Halimbawang sagot (buong na binigyan ng marka)

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