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Discussionacademic·2024

Fitness and gym memberships have become increasingly popular. Some people think this is a positive trend, while others believe it reflects unhealthy lifestyle choices. Discuss both views.

最低250語で書いてください。約40分かけてください。これは本番の 100 試験形式の質問です。

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Step 1

このトピックに関するIELTS 試験官のアドバイス

1

For this 'Discuss both views' essay, dedicate one full body paragraph to each perspective presented in the question. For instance, Body Paragraph 1 should thoroughly explore why gym popularity is a positive trend, while Body Paragraph 2 should examine arguments for it reflecting unhealthy choices. Avoid blending these views within a single paragraph or giving disproportionate attention to one side, as this will undermine your Task Response score.

2

When discussing the positive view, consider arguments like increased public health awareness leading to preventative measures, or the mental health benefits of exercise (e.g., stress reduction, improved mood). For the negative view, you could reference the rise of body image issues fueled by social media influencers, or the financial pressure and potential for injury that an obsessive gym culture can foster. Mentioning the global rise of sedentary office jobs as a driver for structured exercise could also add depth.

3

The most common mistake students make on this question is failing to adequately 'discuss both views' and instead presenting a one-sided argument or merely listing pros and cons without developing them. To avoid this, ensure each body paragraph fully elaborates on its respective view with clear topic sentences, supporting explanations, and relevant examples, maintaining a balanced and objective tone until your conclusion. Do not introduce your personal opinion until the concluding paragraph.

4

Employ clear contrasting and additive linking phrases to navigate between and within your arguments. For example, begin your second body paragraph with a phrase like 'Conversely, on the other hand...' or 'While the aforementioned perspective holds merit, a counter-argument posits that...'. Within paragraphs, use phrases such as 'Furthermore,' 'Moreover,' or 'In contrast' to smoothly connect ideas and examples, ensuring logical flow and cohesion.

5

For a band 8-9 answer on this specific question, examiners look for a nuanced exploration of the underlying societal and psychological factors driving both views, not just superficial descriptions. This includes connecting the 'positive' trend to broader public health initiatives and mental well-being, and the 'unhealthy' aspect to commercialisation, body image pressures, or the pursuit of external validation. Sophisticated vocabulary related to health, sociology, and psychology, combined with complex sentence structures that effectively convey intricate ideas, will distinguish a top-tier response.

Step 2

推奨エッセイ構成(Band 7+ スタンダード)

1
イントロダクション

両側を公平に提示し、自分の立場を確立することで熟練度を示す。

  • 両方の視点を理解していることを示す — これは批判的思考を示す
  • どちら側に傾いているかを述べる — 両方を同等に議論している場合でも
  • 中立的で客観的なトーンを保つ — 感情的な言葉や偏りを避ける

各パラグラフのBand 7+ センテンススターター

There are differing opinions on whether...While some people believe that..., others argue that...This essay will examine both perspectives before reaching a conclusion.
2
ボディパラグラフ1 — 最初の視点

敬意と信頼性を持って一方の側を提示する。

  • たとえ同意しなくても、実際の例を使ってこの見解を誠実に提示する
  • 客観的な報告表現を使う:『研究によると…』、『調査は示している…』、『専門家は主張する…』
  • 長所を認める — これはバランスの取れた分析を示し、得点につながる

各パラグラフのBand 7+ センテンススターター

On the one hand, supporters of this view argue that...Those in favour point out that...A key argument for this position is...
3
ボディパラグラフ2 — 反対の視点

反対意見も同じ深みと洗練さで提示しましょう。

  • 第1段落の構造と深さに合わせてください — 試験官は比較します
  • 対比的な接続詞を使いましょう:『逆に』、『対照的に』、『一方で』
  • 意見がある場合は、この段落を少し強くしましょう — ただし公平さは保って

各パラグラフのBand 7+ センテンススターター

On the other hand, critics contend that...However, there is a strong counter-argument...Conversely, many people feel that...
4
結論

両方の見解を統合し、決定的な判断を下しましょう。

  • 両方の側の妥当性を認めましょう — これは知的な成熟度を示します
  • 自分の好みを明確かつ自信を持って述べましょう — 曖昧にしないで
  • 明確な立場を取りましょう — 試験官は曖昧さより明確さを評価します

各パラグラフのBand 7+ センテンススターター

In conclusion, while both sides have merit, I believe that...Having considered both arguments, it seems that...

Step 3

高得点につながる語彙・コロケーション

sedentary lifestyleA lifestyle characterized by much sitting and little or no regular exercise.
holistic well-beingAn approach to health that considers the whole person and not just the physical symptoms of disease.
body dysmorphiaA mental health condition where a person spends a lot of time worrying about flaws in their appearance that are often unnoticeable to others.
it is widely acknowledged thatA phrase used to introduce a commonly accepted fact or belief.
a compelling argument can be made forUsed to introduce a strong and persuasive point.
this notion is predicated onThis idea is based on or depends on.
from my perspectiveUsed to introduce one's personal opinion.
the evidence overwhelmingly suggestsUsed to indicate strong support for a particular conclusion.
notwithstandingIn spite of; despite.
it could be argued thatUsed to introduce a point that is open to debate or a different perspective.

Step 4

Academic Phrases for This Essay Type

It is widely acknowledged thatThere is compelling evidence to suggestThis phenomenon can be attributed toA growing body of research indicatesThe implications of this are far-reachingThis raises important questions aboutFrom a broader perspectiveIt would be short-sighted to ignore

追加

MoreoverFurthermoreIn additionWhat is more

対比

HoweverNeverthelessOn the other handConversely

原因 / 結果

ConsequentlyAs a resultThereforeThis leads to

例示

For instanceTo illustrateA case in point isSuch as

譲歩

AlthoughWhile it is true thatDespiteAdmittedly

Step 5

Grammar Patterns for Band 7+

譲歩を含む複文

Although some argue that technology isolates people, the evidence suggests it strengthens connections.

高度な文法コントロールを示します。「Although/While」+ 反対の見解で始め、自分の立場を述べる — ニュアンスのある思考を示します。

条件法(タイプ2)

If governments invested more in public transport, traffic congestion would decrease significantly.

仮想的なシナリオや解決策に最適です。構造:「If + 過去形, would + 不定詞」 — 柔軟性と想像力を示します。

academicのための受動態

It is often argued that education should be free. However, this view overlooks the practical challenges.

Academic writingは受動構文を好みます。「It is + 過去分詞 + that」は権威的で客観的なトーンを作ります。

関係節

Students who study abroad, which is becoming increasingly common, tend to develop greater independence.

複雑さを増さずに洗練さを加えます。「who」は人、「which」は物、「that」はどちらにも使います。

密度のための名詞句

The rapid expansion of urban areas has led to increased pollution levels.

より多くの情報を少ない言葉に詰め込みます。「効果的な政策の実施」対「政策は効果的に実施される」 — Lexical Resourceスコアを向上させます。

Step 6

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